Friday, October 22, 2010

I was going to cut some wood...But....

My Sister in Law's tenant passed away just a while ago and she wants the place quiet for a few days for his friends and family.  So it leaves me at a bit of a loss for the rest of the day, as far as serious things to do.  I could go split some of the wood we already have but...maybe I'm just a bit lazy today.  I am also thinking about how my back felt later yesterday after cutting some wood.  McManus used to complain about parks making their hiking trails steeper, I know the feeling, my chainsaws seem to be putting on weight!

This time of year is a bit hard for Brandi, her older brother died years ago, when she was about 16 this time of year.  Her oldest brother died this time of year a year ago and I think there is another death in her family about this time of year so it isn't a time filled with good memories for her.  Even though her SIL's tenant was not a friend of ours we know it will effect her SIL and it will give her more work.  SIL was cleaning up her tenant's affairs, the cleaning up his bills, and some other issues.  Good for him in that she is a very honest person without the baggage that some family might have Don't bother asking me how I know: I know what my sister did to my mother's estate and that was from incompetence and not wanting to "offend" (a nephew lived rent free in a  house for about 18 months, not what he or his parents agreed to..."But his Grandmother would have wanted it that way" says his mother...I don't think so, my Mother would send cash or checks to a grandchild to even up what she gave them compared to the other grandkids just to make sure that she spent the same on each so unless she could have made sure to provide a house for each she would not have done it for one).  I also know how my wife's youngest brother robbed his father blind and then tried to dump him on the VA...but he had always been a thief even as a young man, his parents bailed him out several times.  I get the impression that the tenant did have some issues with his family.  Who doesn't?

Children do have to watch out and pay attention to what is going on in their parent's lives.  Even aside from getting their fair share of the estate (if any) one would not want one's parents being stolen from by a brother or sister...or even a stranger.  Even a short look at the news will reveal stories about older people being ripped off by strangers convincing them that they are helping a niece or nephew or buying a roof job or driveway sealing.  Or somehow they are going to help someone from Nigeria get their fortune...and they will get rewarded.  I never thought anyone would fall for that but we read about someone reporting it to the police a few times each year.  We used to get letters telling us that we  had won something in Canada...after checking with the Post Office we found out that it was a common but "low cost" fraud and no one was really interested in doing much to stop it since there was far bigger frauds going on that they didn't have the time or money to pursue.  When times are tough one does get tempted to fall for this type of stuff so I expect to real more about people falling for such things.

I think that all families are dysfunctional to some degree.  "Leave it to Beaver" families do not exist in the real world.  I think my mother in law spent a good part of her life somehow thinking that she was being cheated by not having a "Leave it to Beaver" or some other fantasy TV show life and she didn't understand that real families have problems that don't get fixed in thirty or sixty minutes (minus the time for the commercials) or even an  hour if it is a very complex problem with worthy of a two part story line.  All families have problems, the important thing is what you do with problems and how do you deal with the results of the problem solving.

Somehow I've drifted off writing about sex, swinging, hotwives and cuckolding.  Not sure quite how it happened.  I know for various reasons we have not been having much sex recently.  Don't know when that will change.  When it does change you will be the third or fourth to know.  I'll guess Brandi will be the first to know, then either me or her lover would be second and if it is a lover I'd guess I'll be third so...

Time does pass, thanks for the sympathy.

Thank you.  At times I still get home and know I have to  check on him, see how he is doing.  When I don't see him where he spent his last months sometimes I almost panic and start to look for him.  Some of the other cats are demanding more attention, at times it seems as if they are working to get our minds off B.  They do remind us that they are still here needing attention, care and food...and love. 

Seems like a lot of death going around.  I have a somewhat distant uncle that I would asssume is dying soon from cancer but the Doctors are still working (removed his bladder this week).  My wife's sister in law lost her husband last year and a long term renter of a house on their property is dying, hospice right now and a matter of days I'd guess.  She had to put a pet to sleep not too long ago.  Life does go on and it is interesting to think how life does go on. I hate to sound too Disney about it but we all are born and we all will die at some point.

My parents were both buried and the cemetery required a vault and all that.  Father was not embalmed but my Mother was, against her wishes, but I'd been to another Uncle's funeral in the South (small town South does funerals RIGHT!) not too long before and I found the viewing and all that to be a big comfort for all of his friends and family so I got the rest of the family to go for that.  If there is an afterlife I guess I will have to answer to my Mother about that...she was strongly against it.  But somehow I doubt if I will be in the same place as my Mother, being rather lacking in some respects.

My wife's parents were both cremated, their wishes.  But in recent years my wife has decided she would like to be shrouded and buried, no embalming.  I am still not sure how I feel about that and to be honest I don't worry about what might be done with my body, it will not matter to me at that point.  While I am not "looking forward" or wanting to die I've found that I do feel a lot more mortal these days. 

While over all my health is pretty good I do have some long term pain issues that are getting worse rather than better and I have a lot more understanding of why some people choose to end their lives.  So I guess I accept that I will die and of course at my age it will be sooner than later (I'll be 59 in a few days so I don't expect 59 more birthdays) and as long as it sticks to what should be...parents do not outlive their kids...I think I can face it.

As I have mentioned in the past I was (or is it like being a Marine...once one always one?) a pilot for years and about 20,000 hours (not a lot in some ways so I'm not bragging by any means) and I got to fly to some interesting places and I got to fly some interesting aircraft.  But I've gone flying with a friend in light airplane, a almost 60 year old taildragger and one that has a reputation for not wanting to be "good" on landings or take-offs (good to get a little humility now and then eh?). It is worth a posting so I will try to get on it.  But I have cars to work on and wood to cut (and the chainsaws are getting heavier and bending over with one to cut firewood is real killer for my back) and other "fun" things to do.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Another Non-Sexual Post...no politics either.

We have several cats(about fifteen) (and one ferret).  Ever since we have been married we have always had cats.  We had cats before we were married.  One of the problems we had when we were first married was that our cat family did not get along.  But it worked out after a while.  One of the things that might cause us to not get divorced would be...who would get the cats?!

I am really not sure how many cats we have right now.  We have three shop cats that are pretty much feral that we were given by a couple moving into an assisted living facility.  A couple more that spend more time out than in, a stray that now lets me hold him, and the house cats that spend most of their time inside.  We live on eight acres so it isn't that big of a deal.

But one of our special cats died yesterday.  He was all black, about seven years old.  Darling Daughter got him at the vet, he showed up at the Vet's during a snow storm...a little black hungry kitten.  After he was checked out by the Vet we kept him.

Like I said we have had a lot of cats and some are more special than others.  He was very special.  Good personality, friendly to people and to other cats.  A real people cat.  Loved being around people.  Would walk with me down the drive to get the paper.  Spend time in the garage when I was working on a car.  Whenever the washing machine was filling...he would be there, watching and playing with the water.  Liked being carried.  Would ride on my shoulders.  Loved being played with, he liked being held by  his rear legs...dangling.  Never had another cat do that.  Fixed but still an alpha male but didn't fight much and enjoyed playing with kittens.

About seven months ago we took him to the Vet.  The one we got him from.  He was not acting like himself.  He had been a very graceful and active cat and now he was not so graceful.  Didn't make all of his jumps.  Something wasn't right.

Something wasn't right!  Feline Leukemia!  We had another  cat that tested positive for FLV years ago.  Told to put her to sleep but we couldn't.  She lived for years...never infected another cat and before she died she no longer tested positive.

The Vet said about half the cases live a long time and some, he wasn't sure of the numbers, just seem to "cure" by themselves.  He didn't think we should put him to sleep.

He never complained.  Up to last week we could pet him, brush him, feed him and he would purr.  And purr.  It has been months since he could walk.  Treats.  What ever food we thought he would like.  Tuna, bacon, ham, fancy cat food.  Water and broth by syringe to keep him hydrated.  About a month ago he started losing weight.  More treats and more effort to find things he would eat.  More broth and water by syringe.  Still no complaining.  No idea what to do.  He could crawl some and did at times.  The Vet said to watch and when he starts hiding he is in pain and it might be time to put him to sleep.  But he never hid.  And he would purr...a great purr.

This last week he just would not eat much.  Yesterday morning I had him on a pad on our bed.  He liked being there.  That morning he ate some bacon, took a little broth and that was it.  Got a little more broth in him about noon.  I'd check on him about every hour, try to get some liquid in him.  About three I saw that he had moved off the pad and had wet the bed.  I moved him and his pad to the floor and stripped the bed and started washing the sheets, spread and all.  About forty minutes later I was in our  bedroom and checked on him.  Paws were moving, like he was kneading.  He was moving some.  I got down with him and held him, petted him, talked to him.  In less than ten minutes he was still.  Dead.  Letting my wife know was hard.  She would feel bad that she was not with him.  Darling Daughter, who does not live with us any more, cried at the news.  Yes, he is ours but she is the one that had him first.  Our son was upset and he isn't a cat person.  He was that kind of cat!

I really don't think he had much pain, maybe a bit right at the end.  I don't know.  I hope he didn't have much pain.  I don't know what I would do different.  When B gets home from work in a bit we will pick out a spot to bury him.  We will find a place that he liked in the yard.  Maybe close to the pond since he loved water...loved the pond.  He would play in the stream of water from the spitting frog.

Pets are not..."just a pet", "just a cat", "just a dog" or "just a ferret".  Pets are part of our family.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

A little bit on kissing and then a little political stuff from Bob Altemeyer. LONG POST WARNING

I wrote this a while back to post at, I assume, Your Hotwives or Our Hotwives http://ourhotwives.org/ a site well worth checking out.  It really is a too long post about how our views on Brandi kissing the men she was fucking changed and how it improved the sex for her and made it more enjoyable for me.  At the same time it may also have been a step or two toward my interest in cuckolding or being cuckolded. 

Kissing her lovers, how my wife started kissing her friends:

Some years ago when my wife had first started going out on dates she found it hard to really explain to me what she wanted in a lover. Even at that point we knew that finding someone to fuck her was not that big of problem but it was and is far harder to find someone that she not only wants to fuck and wants to fuck her then we also add that  someone is right for them to become friends and lovers. She wanted to be with a man
that she enjoyed being with in and out of bed, while sex would be important and the primary reason for the relationship she also wanted, dare we say ("Dare…Dare"), a "relationship" with him in and out of bed.

Like a lot of couples we started with the idea of trying a mfm and going on to swinging (like a lot of wives Brandi did not like the idea of seeing or knowing that her husband was fucking another woman). It took a while to find the right guy and even though we started with the idea of finding the right man to just fuck without really thinking about it my wife sifted through the responses and found someone that was interesting to her, interesting in and out of bed. So we started with just the idea of a cock for her to fuck and without really thinking about it we actually were looking for a man that she could respect and like and I could get along with as well. I guess it was really her looking a bit further into finding a man, a person, rather than just a "cock".

Now to be sure for a lot of people that enjoy "swinging", "Hotwife" games the words "friendship" or "relationship" or even the term "lover" can be red flags and can cause heartburn or panic or any number of negative feelings. In our beginning that is how we felt to a point, at least that was what we were telling each other. But looking back at things it is obvious that my wife didn't just want to find a cock to slide into her, she actually wanted someone that she could talk to as well but also looking back I am not sure why or how she (we) arrived at that idea.

It was long time before my wife kissed the first man aside from me, her husband, that she had sex with as a married woman. To us like a lot of other swingers and other alternative lifestyle people kissing seemed so intimate, too intimate, my wife could fuck other men (fucking them bare back and insisting that they come in her or on her seems to come in a distant second best),  but it is okay to let other men eat her pussy, fondle her tits and ass and she could even suck their cocks but NO KISSING and no "friendship" just sex! Just fucking really since sex might include "making love". So how did the first guy that we met also be the first one
to screw my wife, what we planned on but also in a while became the first man to kiss my wife in a romantic way aside from me her hubby and also be her first "lover" as well as fuck buddy?

So we wrote Henry and we talked to Henry and at last we met Henry and we both liked him and thought he might be suitable for our first try at adding some excitement to our sex life. We didn't play that first meeting. For various reasons including him living three hours away and our first child coming along we didn't meet him again for a long time, might have been almost two years. At last we met him again and my wife had sex with
him. They fucked. We had planned on her using condoms with him but my wife got carried away and enjoyed him bareback and had him come in her pussy. No kissing!  Stop and think about that logic, let him come in your pussy and you are not on birth control but do not kiss him! The next morning after our first threesome my wife and I talked about it and after a lot of avoiding the subject directly we did face the big question.
Should we do it again! We were in agreement, we both wanted to see Henry again and we were open to trying to find another man and trying playing with a couple.

Henry lived out of our area so we were not able to see him often. We had poor luck finding a couple that we both wanted to play with. However the friendship between Henry and my wife and me was growing. Henry and my wife would chat now and then on the phone, letters once in a while and we did meet now and then and my wife and Henry had sex and I would watch some and join in some and we had great times with
him. All was going well, except I did want to play some with another woman myself but finding the right one or the right couple was difficult. My wife kept enjoying Henry bareback, no rubbers, and really enjoyed feeling him coming in her, there was some risk since she was nursing and was of course not on the pill or using any other form of birth control. We didn't think about that at the time but later we found the fact that she had
been enjoying him with that added risk of pregnancy to be exciting and she did admit years later that if she had become pregnant with his or another lover's child she (and she means we) would have kept the child.

So Henry was going to be down in a few days and Brandi was looking forward to seeing him. At this point we didn't still quite know what to call him, we didn't call him her "lover" but that wasn't all that important but it does show some of our state of mind.  Anyway I was talking to Brandi and asked her about kissing. How it was a part of sexand fun. After we beat around that subject for a while I asked her if she felt her fun with
Henry might be better if they kissed or would that be too romantic or intimate for her.  After some hesitation Brandi kind of let me know that she thought she would enjoy kissing Henry and that she did feel kissing was a natural part of having sex and that while it was intimate…it might be okay to kiss Henry if it would not bother me too much. In a roundabout way we agreed that it would be okay for my wife to kiss Henry the next time
we saw him.

A day or so later we saw Henry, I don't recall if Brandi had told him it would be okay if they kissed or if I told him ahead of time or if Brandi told him about the rule change.  Actually I am not sure how he got the news and I am not sure if we asked him if he wanted to kiss my wife. Anyway he got the word that kissing was now okay! The first kisses between them were a bit tentative, not too sensual. I had the feeling that they were feeling their way not only how they felt about adding the kissing but also wondering how I would take my wife kissing the other man she fucks besides her husband. It wasn't but moments until they were really kissing, full mouthed, lips locked, deep breathing and moans from my wife, I think Henry might have been moaning too.  Lot of lust and passion! Tongues flicking out and in. Kissing with obvious tongue play. It did set me back a bit, some shock seeing my wife kissing another man so deeply, with such passion. With such enjoyment. It was shocking and hot!

It was obvious my wife enjoyed kissing Henry and I was pretty sure that it added to Henry's arousal and passion as well. It wasn't long before I could see a change in how Henry and my wife interacted. The kissing made a difference during sex obviously but my wife and Henry now seemed a bit more flirtatious. It wasn't long until they kissed when they were not having sex, when we were out having dinner together or going someplace together. The kissing led to them acting more like a couple when they were together.

I will not lie to you and say it was no big deal to see my wife kissing Henry. It was. In some ways it was as big as deal as seeing that first time my wife grab Henry's thick cock and guide it into her pussy! Seeing my wife guiding another man's cock into her, that really told me that she wanted his cock in her, she wanted to, really wanted to fuck someone other than me, her husband! My heart was pounding so hard that first time I saw my wife welcome another man's cock into her I thought I might have a heart attack.  The kissing, seeing them kiss the first time was not quite that dramatic but it was dramatic and shift in how I saw my wife and Henry and how I saw them together. I also think that it was indeed a shift in how they saw each other. In a lot of ways my first feelings were a bit of "hurt" or even "pain". Yes we kiss family and friends. But kissing your
kids, your mother, your father, Aunt Melba is one kind of kiss. Kissing your girlfriend, you wife, your boyfriend, your husband your lover is a different kind of kiss and it means different things, it says different things to the people kissing and to anyone watching. It says a lot to a person that is a love relationship with one of the people kissing. They were kissing in a sensual and romantic way! It is very intimate!

Since it added a lot to my wife's pleasure and she took that added pleasure out on me in most pleasurable ways it didn't take me too long to get used to it. It had not taken long for Brandi to sit by Henry when we were out and to sit with him in the car when we were going some place but I felt they did a bit more flirting and touching and yes they did kiss frequently and it was any time they were together, not just when they were having sex. It was obvious to me that the sex was hotter, more passionate, more exciting for my wife.  Since her passion with Henry meant more passion with me after she had been with Henry I got to enjoy the effects of her increased excitement with Henry.

Of course once she had kissed Henry it was of course no big deal for her to kiss the next man.  After Henry we tried parties and a swing bar in Reno. Very little kissing at the swing bar and at that time there was little kissing at the parties we went to. However I noticed that guys would kiss her away from the group at parties, if they were more alone, off to the side or in a more private room. I still found it arousing to see her kissing other men in a romantic and sensual way. To this day I still find it arousing and hot to see my wife
kissing a lover or even just a fuck buddy.

Brandi assures me that she still finds kissing a lover to add a lot to the sex or the love making and she enjoys kissing the right lover or fuck buddy in front of me, in public and in private. She does tell me that having the freedom to kiss and caress and be caressed by a lover in public and in front of me adds a lot to her fun. She does enjoy the feeling of being her lover's and she enjoys the intense but different feelings she gets from
being his in private or just when the two of them are together or when I am there and she is "his" while I watch. Different feelings to her but both hot.

Political Stuff:


Robert Altemeyer has been studying Authoritarians for years and probably know as much as any person knows about them and more than most people know about them.  The link takes you to his comments on the Tea Party.  A long time ago I was a Republican including being a "Young Republican" and casting a vote for Nixon.  I learned as a YR that the "jokes" a lot of my fellow Young Republicans made were not really jokes. They hated blacks, Latinos, Asians (except Asian women) and women (except for sex and of course respecting "Mom")  I think (with deep regret) that the party has been taken over by the baser elements of America and it is a pity.  Take a look and I think you will find it very interesting (and if you are like me you see a bit of yourself in some things because we are not black and white but various shades of gray or grey).

http://home.cc.umanitoba.ca/~altemey/drbob/Comment%20on%20the%20Tea%20Party.pdf

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

1. Commando: Sexy or disgusting? Do you have a "best" commando story

It can be quite sexy on females or males.  I don't go commando too often due to liking a bit of support and I guess habit.  At times Brandi will go and when she is dating it depends in part on what pleases her lover.  Best story:  Brandi used to play a fair amount of tennis and would still love to play some...tennis.  Years ago we were stopping by to visit my mother and she was a great lady but not at all open about certain subjects but not really a prude either.  So Brandi for my enjoyment was wearing one of her tennis skirts minus the panties...no bra either but that isn't important.  We were chatting with my mother and Brandi was standing next to where my mother was sitting.  My mom flipped up Brandi's skirt as she was asking, "I've always wondered just what do you wear under those little skirts..."  When she recovered...not all that much later she commented..."Now I know!"

Another time we were out with one of her lovers and sitting upstairs in a bar...just one of those simple railings and she and Henry were sitting close and at some point in the evening she had lost her thong.  At some point Henry noticed that there were a few tables down below that had some guys giving her a look and of course she was not really paying attention and her legs were a bit open as well as Henry had a hand on and at times between them.  A college town so it gave an older woman (late 30's at that time) a bit of a thrill in some ways that they were so interested in her...

2. Foreplay: Is there such a thing as too much?

There comes a time that it is appropriate to move on.  Mercifully Brandi seems to agree with me on that, at some point she wants more than foreplay.



3. Oral sex: Good if you are getting? Good is you are giving? Equally ewwwww?


I enjoy getting and giving.  There can be such a thing as a bad blow job but a bad blow job is a lot better than no blow job.  Brandi doesn't  feel she is all that great at it but I think she is pretty darn good and is usually enthusiastic about it.  Someone that enjoys doing it adds to the pleasure.  I've been told by her and by others I am pretty darn good at oral sex even to the point of having a partner ask her husband..."Why can't you eat  my pussy like that?"  Most guys seem to take that okay but I do worry.  (Oregon is a easy "carry" state! LOL)

4. Orgasm: Is one per night enough or does the first one just get your motor running?

For me, one is usually it so I try to make it last and be a good one. Given the right time and place two is possible and once in a great while three.  Brandi is very easy multi-orgasmic.  One is just foreplay for her.



5. Morning sex: "Oh hell yes!", "Well if I have, too." or "Just get in the shower and go to work."


Ah, time and place again.  Used to be great but we seem to have so many demands on our time and so tired a lot of the time.
 
Bonus (as in optional): Have you ever had anonymous sex? Have you ever had an orgasm without at least
 knowing your partner's last name?

Yes for both of us. We used to do some swing parties...

I blew the credit for this...so I will try to add it later.

 

Sunday, April 11, 2010

It has been a while...busy, had minor surgery and some other things...

A few questions...

Do I still fly?  Nope, I'd like to but there are the issues of being "disabled" and then getting a FAA medical.  I think I could get a Third Class Medical (Private Pilot) and then do some flying but the other issue is of course money.  It is quite pricey to me to go rent an airplane.  I'm used to getting paid for my flying, not having to pay for it.  I know that sounds very snotty but the money is a real issue (if I had more I'd do it).  I'd love to do some flying even if I was paying for it.  If I ever win the lottery...

I miss the travel in my flying, it was fun seeing the world but I also miss the flying.  It is hard express the pleasure you feel with a flight well done.  A smooth take off, a trouble free flight and then a smooth approach and landing.  When it all fits together and works out just right it is so much fun...and pleasure.


Brandi's Concern...Leaving me?  No, don't think that is really a big issue to her.  She has had a few guys in the past get interested in more than sex and friendship and when it got to be too much they were gone.  I am sure that there is some thrill for the both of us in the risk of Brandi finding a lover that gets to her so much that she is seriously thinking of leaving but so far all the guys she has been with have had at least one warning flag to her that it really wouldn't work in the long run with them.  I am sure that she has day dreamed or fantasized about running away with one or two or even running away for a weekend or a week or two or even longer as in really running away but we all have fantasies that we don't really expect or want to live out.

I still think that the issues are age (energy), the pressure of the one kid at home, money...due to me not working (disability is better than nothing and I am very grateful for it but...), time (she does work full time and most weekends she is at work so that takes up time that a lot of people use for playing), my continuing health issues (we are still working on my back and head pain and no real answers yet...I know the pain does not help my attitude or my energy level and I am unable to do things I used to do with ease, like work on the yard and cars).  I also think that she doesn't feel all that sexy or desirable right now.  Also she feels a bit down in that the men that she has meet (and not had sex with) just were not quite what she was seeking.  She tends to forget that in the past she has had times when it just seemed impossible to find the right lover and it does take a fair amount of effort to find them at times.  Look around at the honest hotwife or cuckolding blogs and you see that it is a common complaint.  Of course one of the funny things to go along with that is that you either have no good prospects or a flood of guys that really seem to work.  Seems rare to be in some sort of  place  between the extremes.  Oh well.

Aside from not much at all going on.  The new kittens are beginning to romp and stomp. Great consternation for the older cats and we are having to be very careful with our feet.  Six little furry commandos running around.  Delightful to watch.  Mom cat is being a good mom and she also is quite the hunter.  Saw her very efficiently dispatch a rather large rat...that bit at the neck and twist.  Very well done and the rat was about half her weight if not a bit more so it was impressive.

Off for a little yard work and chores.  Later.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Killing a few moments while the pain med kicks in.

I took our son into work and traded cars since the one I took in was low on fuel.  On the way home the dreaded "Check Engine Light" came on.  On Classic Rangies that isn't always a big deal.  For us it is usually an O2 sensor and at times it does mean that the O2 sensor is dead and at other times it is a bad connection or a transient fault and it doesn't come back after being cleared.  But when I got home it had turned cold and hail was falling sooo...I made a command decision and went in to get a bite to eat and take some pain med and wait for the hail to stop.

After Brandi had left for work I went back to bed, she leaves for work at 0515 most weekend days. But when I woke up I watched a bit of an old video I had of Brandi and H her first lover as a married woman.  I think I wrote up a bit about him but to digress I'm going to go back through the postings here and see if I can tie up any loose ends and also see where I was on our story of how we went from being a typical (define "typical"?) married couple to where we are now.  Not that the place we are in right now is exciting but parts of the trip might be interesting and informative to other cuckolds and hotwife hubbies and maybe even swingers.

So on this tape I have three meetings with Henry that all have me there and are years apart and were edited some just to make them shorter, to fit on a 180 minute tape.  I have tried to move them to DVD's but the burner I bought (a Sony VHS-DVD unit but I don't have the number in front of me) was new but a clearance item and it turned out to have no manual or remote.  I can't seem to close the DVD so while I can play it on the burner the DVDs will play no where else.  I think that it might be time to buy one of the Fry's re-manufactured units that they have on special fairly often for $100.  Most of the time our bottom feeding shopping works well but this time it didn't.

So I am watching this episode and thinking that to me that it is both hot and very obvious that she was enjoying being with H and enjoying the love making with him and also enjoying her husband watching. 

We were living in Madera at the time and we had been out for dinner and drinks with H.  The kids were else where so the house was ours and the cats.  Brandi was wearing a white lace dress, a lacy white thone, garter belt, stockings, heels and a top that was lace in front and stretch in back.  A wide white leather belt with a little gold trim on it completed the outfit.  The dress...yes you could see through it and see her thong, bare butt, the straps going down to the stockings.  She had a bit of a tan so the contrast was  rather sexy.  The top, her bare breasts were obvious and between her large dark nipples and aureoles, the slightly pale breasts then her tanned olive toned skin it was wonderful.  She looked great and the evening had got her more than a bit aroused.  She isn't really an exhibitionist but when she thinks she looks good and is in the right place she enjoys showing off a bit.  As we moved through the crowd at a couple of the bars we hit the looks from me and the glares from women were fun to see and her ass got  groped and fondled a bit.


I seem to recall that it was about a forty-five minute or so drive from Fresno back to our house in Madera.  I don't think that H and Brandi sat together but I might be wrong on that.  But when we were out they sat together and danced together and even at this stage in our relationship they were the obvious couple that evening.  Didn't push it too much but she didn't get to see H all that often since he lived in the Bay area and between the distance and his marriage we didn't get to see him all that often...but he and my wife talked frequently on the phone and when we got a computer they emailed and enjoyed staying in touch.  It was plain to see that they were friends, pretty close friends and I'd guess one that saw them this night and some other nights...would find reason to think they were lovers.  The touching, the kissing, the holding each other, the attention they paid to each other and the way they focused on each other and part of what I loved (and hated a bit, made me a bit jealous and envious) was they whispered to each other.  That look, that glow my wife's eyes get with some men was there in full force with H.

So we get home and I pour three glasses of wine (Brandi had enjoyed little to drink, unlike some women we know Brandi didn't like to drink a lot when she was seeing a lover, she wanted to enjoy him and the time they had together and didn't need to use alcohol to either make it happen or to give her a later excuse for it happening) and we sit and chat for a bit.  It isn't long before I bring out the video camera and set things up.

The video starts with a close up of Brandi and her lover kissing and just gets better.  All this was just to say that it is either a case of my wife being a fantastic actress or she really enjoyed being with H.  I think while she can do a very convincing fake orgasm the later is the case here...she was with a man she liked in and out of bed (or the middle of the living room) and she was  having a great time.  Her intensity and her enjoyment is very plain to see and you can also see that there is a closeness that isn't always there in cuckolding and even less often in swinging since for a lot of swingers even friendship is too much much less real closeness.

It is very enjoyable to me to watch H and my wife.  The lust, the friendship and dare I say...even the love between them is obvious and the sex is very intense.  The touching, the kissing, the slow undress, the caressing.  Seeing my wife ease down H's underwear and to see the delight and lust on my wife's face when her lover's very hard thick cock springs out dripping pre-come.  Then to watch as my wife takes his cock into her mouth and plays with it, rubs the string of pre-come around her face as she enjoys the moment with him.

After my wife is soundly fucked to several orgasms and after she demands that H come in her...and of course he does, wouldn't you?  Then I get to see my wife and her lover standing next to each other, naked, well almost naked my wife is still in her heels, stockings, garter belt as they cuddle, kiss, touch, and whisper to each other.  She caresses H's cock, wet, shiny, still pretty  darn impressive (I tend to shrink pretty fast after an orgasm), dripping from her moisture as well as his own, H did tend to come a lot and that was something my wife found rather sexy and enjoyable.  So it was obvious that they had a great time.

The point of all this?  What happened?  What happened to make her still voice the words that say she wants to play but at the same time for her to keep throwing rocks, logs, on the road to her meeting someone?  I'm going to try to find out and also I'm going to look back and see if I find any clues there.

Yes, I know we have other problems, cats, kids, my health but those problems are not really new and who doesn't have problems. 

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Time has passed and nothing really new and exciting...

I've heard a few times from one of Brandi's old lovers (an ex-airline pilot) and to be honest we have talked about flying rather than sex.  I've really enjoyed the talk about flying and I recently stopped by the local general aviation airport and talked flying with some of the people (flight instructors and so on) at one of the FBO's.  It is funny in some ways that to me one's own life is "normal" and it is every one else that has the unusual life.  Brandi thinks I am an idiot for thinking that and that my life has been pretty interesting.  I can kind of see that trying to look at it as someone not looking out but looking into it.  Most days I bother to think about it I feel it has been a mixture of unusual stuff and a lot of boring things.  However we all are products of our life and the life I had does make me a bit rootless and no long term friends.  I understand that is common for military brats and I'd guess State Department brats and others that have moved frequently growing up.

I read about and of course I've know people that are friends with people they knew in high school or even longer than that.  I've tried to get in touch with some of my old class mates and even an old girlfriend but after a few emails things just...fade away.  No luck on the girl friend and it is a pity.  I think my brother and his wife messed up that years ago, K had tried to call me a few times after my father and my mother had died but they never gave me the message.  I can still recall the shock I had showing up at SLO High School for my Junior year.  I'd been in an all male military school the year before and I showed up a day late at "Tiger Town".   Had a bit too much fun in Hong Kong.  So I show up in Mrs Bowles class, English and there is a classroom with two other guys and a mess of girls including some real stunners.  I am a bit gob smacked, hope I use that right.  Mrs Bowles has me sitting in the front row at the end of the row, the three girls around me, two rather striking, had know each other since kindergarten!  A shock to me since I had moved every three or so years most my life.  The longest we had lived in one place up to that point was Laos, we were there from '65 to '71.  Several of the girls had known each other for that amount of time.

It was a bit of culture shock.  A year in a military school in Texas before this year and it was a few weeks before I could relax when a teacher walked in the room...we had to stand at attention at the military school whenever a teacher or other staff walked into the room.  Also it was of course the era of mini-skirts and it was...well it took a bit of adjusting.  Also I couldn't stop in a bar and have a drink, no easy dope, no "houses" that ranged in price from a 500 to 1500 kip...it was 500 kip to the dollar.  No maid, no house boy.  But of course the other State Department and military brats I know had similar lives.  I had a few dates with a girl in Laos that had spent about a total of six months in public schools in America.  She was fourteen or fifteen, a rather sexy slender girl and had spent about two years total in America.  An American yes, but she freely admitted that she didn't fit in at all in the American public schools she had experienced.

I've been working on the Rangie for about a week or a bit more just trying to do the front pads and rotors but it just isn't going well.  Not sure all the reasons why but part of it is my back.  So much pain now I really am limited in what I can do and handling one rotor or even putting the wheels back on take a lot out of me.  The continual pain also makes me a bit moody and a little quicker on the temper than I like.  Still not quite the way it should be so tomorrow I will get some more brake fluid and bleed the brakes again.  The anti-skid on it makes bleeding the brakes a real chore.  Oh well...I am trying.

Already a third of the way through March and I can't recall when we last made love or had sex.  I'd guess about the first half of Feb.?  Not sure what is happening or why.  Ed (the guy from Orange County) called last month and B said that she was going to call him.  I'd guess it has been a month since he called and of course no call to him from B.  I guess what bothers me a bit about it is that I have told her several times in the past two years that...if you don't want to do it I'll be happy to close down the ads and put it all behind us.  Each time I say that she tells me that she is interested and wants to play.  So where did things go bad?   Is it just that she is tired of the run of guys she isn't really interested in?  Or?

While she was helping me bleeding the brakes (it is a two person job) we talked a bit and again she says she is interested.  I'm actually a bit clueless about what is going on.  In the past she has seemed to enjoy emailing and talking on the phone with potential lovers but now she doesn't even make an effort to  stay in touch with guys that she enjoyed a friendship with as well as enjoying them in bed or in other places.  She did expect me to do the dirty work, running the ads, responding to the first messages, sifting through them to find ones that might work.  Then she would email and chat on the phone with them and decide who to meet.  She liked getting to know a guy well enough that she felt that she was meeting for sex.  Yes, the guy could talk her out of her fucking him and some did but she was planning to fuck them, if not on the first date certainly on the second.  She did like me along on the first meeting or couple of meetings but she did meet some men without me along and had some lovers that I never met and one that thought she was a cheating wife.

So I'll try to find out what it going on in my wife's mind.  Might be some of the other things in our life.  One of our cats has FIV.  A bit of a problem with the IRS (the people she worked for told the IRS that all of their workers got a $2000 grant for adopting a child).  Funny how our dependents didn't change so I do think that the IRS works at being stupid for lower income people and works at not finding problems with high income people...since they can afford to hire good lawyers and accountants and how much can you afford to fight for a few thousand dollars? And of course the slow work I am doing on the car and other things due to my growing pain, back and side. 

After working on the car I'm ready to scream!  Forty degrees F, on mud and gravel and dirt falling in my eyes from the underside of the beast...but I do enjoy the feelings one gets when the job is done and done right!  But I have to rate pain at about seven or eight after taking some moderate pain med.  If you are younger take care of yourself, getting old and beat up sucks! 

I've had the fun of seeing more Doctors that I really want to and with for some things being paid for by three insurance companies the two that are first to pay argue and argue and then the Doctors don't help by providing them with the information that they request.  The pain is rough but I've avoiding doing things for some of the problems since I just can't deal with the problems seeing Doctors cause and of course the cost is a part but I'm tired of spending hours per week dealing with the bills.  But for all the complaints about Medicare...it seems to work great in that the medical people know what they will and will not pay for and they make me dream of single payer.

I'll talk to B in the next few days and see if I can learn more.  We tried to snuggle a bit last  night fitting ourselves around the cats on the bed and I have to marvel just how sexy and beautiful I still find my wife and just how great her skin feels...as well as her great tits for her age or just about any age. 

Monday, January 11, 2010

Nothing New to Report...

I've been busy with things around the house and the car.  The Rangie is running rough, not sure what it might be but I'm going to replace the plugs, rotor, cap, fuel filter and see what that does.  I'll also do an oil and filter change and finish the brakes by doing the front brakes.  The brakes should not be too bad except for it being done outside in the winter time in a place that has winter.  Ah well.

Also I'll keep working on the doors, painting and fixing the ones in the shop and putting the locks and so on for the doors in the "new" room.  Got one on and only two to go, french doors so a little different but the hardware is all the same so the steep part of the learning curve is over.

No news on the hotwife/cuckolding side of our lives.  No news from E2 the guy from down in California has not been heard from for over a week.  I tend to think that no news is bad news here but I'm not sure.  So if Brandi says the words I'll start looking again.